Suddenly when Colin’s laugh filled his ears, he didn’t feel so embarrassed about the freckle comment he made. It always managed to cheer him up, soothe his anger, or just in general…bring calm.
So close. He had never been this close to someone…at least not this willingly and caringly. His eyes drifted closed for a mere couple of seconds before opening once again to meet Colin’s emerald gaze. What were they doing? Who cares? Damian didn’t. The only thing that mattered right now was Colin, the only thing on his mind, in his sights, and he wanted to keep it that way.
Damian’s eyes widened slightly, not having expected the feeling of the others lips on his own. The kiss was incredibly short, but it sent electricity through his body. It was something he had never felt before. Whatever it was, it was nothing but happiness itself. He swore he had Supermans powers for the brief couple of seconds. He wanted that feeling again, it was too good to let go of.
Damian’s shocked expression softened and he just shook his head and furrowed his brows in determination. He looked straight into the other boy’s eyes. A hand reaching out and grabbing Colins upper arm strongly but not enough to hurt him, pushed him back over on his back, while Damian sat up on his side a little more, hovering above the other boy. He swallowed his nervousness, and ignored the firestorm on his face and leaned in, kissing him once again, but a little stronger, and longer this time. The electricity came back…that same feeling. He loved it. He loved….Colin? His eyes closed as he kissed him. One hand on the boy’s shoulder, and the other being used to prop himself up and over Colin without actually having to have his whole body over the boy.
He broke off the innocently long kiss and kept his eyes closed for a moment longer. To think back on the feeling, the kiss, Colin, and to cherish it before opening his eyes to look back down at Colin once again. A look of childish nervousness and shyness crossed his features and he no longer found himself able to hold Colin’s gaze any longer. He looked off to the side slightly, unsure of himself. What did he just do? Was he to forceful? What would Colin think about him after that? No…he didn’t want to know. Whatever it was, it probably wouldn’t be good. All this nervousness welled up inside of him because of this completely new experience. It actually frightened him. He’s never wanted something like that before…not like that. But…it was right. Nothing happiness.
When Damian doesn’t say anything in resonse, Colin chances a glance and at seeing the shocked expression on the other boy’s face, he feels his heart practically sink like a rock in his chest and a cold feeling envelop him. He opens his mouth to apologize one more, but he never gets the chance to. Because right then, Damian’s expression softens and the look in his eyes makes Colin’s breath hitch and catch in his throat.
And then he’s pushed onto his back and those eyes are hovering above him, locked with his own and the determination in them and the dark blush on Damian’s face has his heart skip a beat as it starts to race. And before he realizes it, soft lips are pressing against his. An electric spark shoots down his spine and runs through his entire body, making his toes curl and his eyes flutter shut after a few, wonderful moments and he softly, just a hint uncertainly, presses his lips back against Damian’s to return the kiss.
Just a short second later though, Damian pulls away. The electricity is replaced with soft disappointment as Colin slowly opens his eyes, because…he wouldn’t have minded if the kiss had been longer. A little. Or…or much.
Glancing up at Damian, he blinks a little at the sight of nervousness and shyness on the other’s face and when he looks away, Colin can’t help but giggle softly. He’s never seen Damian look quite like this before. Or act like this. A gentle smile spreads across his face as the butterflies returns more forcefully than ever before as he keeps looking up at the other boy, only making him think back on that kiss and…everything. How he had felt. How he is feeling. And…it’s a good feeling. A great and just wonderful one that Colin is having a hard time putting into words.
“I…I think I feel even weirder now,” he says softly, quietly, gently and truthfully with a dark blush, the smile on his face widening as he keeps his gaze on Damian.
‘I think I feel even weirder now’ Thats all he needed to hear, and he instantly assumed the worst. Colin thought it was terrible, that he hated it, hated Damian for what just happened. Except…that little laugh the Colin had let out just before that made him pause. He wanted to just leave, knowing…feeling what he did was wrong…but that laugh…what did it mean?
Damian let go of Colin and sat up in the bed, feeling nothing but confused, and embarrassed from Colin’s laughter. His previous feeling of complete happiness suddenly gone. He didn’t see the smile on Colin’s face to reassure him that everything was alright…maybe even welcomed. Damian simply felt hatred for himself…he took enjoyment out of that kiss, when he knew that Colin must have despised it. He enjoyed it…how wrong is that? It felt wrong…it hurt.
His emotions were scattered completely beyond his own comprehension, none of this was familiar to him. He couldn’t even bring himself to say anything in response to Colin…not even an apology passed his lips. He simply remained in his own torturous silence, wishing, hoping that these awful feelings of confusion and hate would leave him. He just wanted to feel that happiness again…to have some sort of reassurance that everything was alright.
The thing that hurt him the most was that he would possibly lose his friendship with Colin. Friendship…friend…his first friend. Someone he knew actually cared about him. Why did having someone care about him mean so much to him? Especially Colin…he couldn’t even imagine his life without Colin there anymore. He knew this was absolute nonsense…yet he couldn’t help it. It took over, and he was frightened.
When Damian doesn’t say anything, Colin blinks, and his smile falls as he sees…guilt? Confusion, embarrassment and also…hate? Why is Damian looking like that? Did he do or say something wrong? Does he…does he regret it? The kiss?
His throat tightens at the thought and he swallows hard, slowly pushing himself up into a sitting position as well. Confusion is clear on his face, along with embarrassment and fear. Fear that Damian is regretting doing what he did. That he only did it because Colin kissed him first. That he didn’t really want to do it.
“Dami, I’m really sorry! I-I didn’t mean to force you or- you didn’t have to do that if you didn’t want to, I mean, I really, really liked it and I like you, but I didn’t mean for you to feel forced to do anything, and I’m really sorry, I should’ve asked if I could have k-kissed you first, but I didn’t, and I’m sorry, but please don’t hate me? I like you and I-” He’s rambling and although he knows what he wants to say, he can’t get the words together properly, but it’s alll still there. He likes Damian. He liked the kiss. And he’s sorry for making Damian feel forced to kiss him, when he didn’t want to.
In the end, he simply trails off, letting the words die out, and his gaze drops. He can’t look at Damian anymore, too embarrassed, confused and scared to. His heart is racing and his face is so red from how hard he’s blushing. Biting his lip to keep himself from rambling again, he clenches the sheets in his hands hard, entire body tense like a bowstring as he waits for Damian’s reaction.